Ways To Discuss Grandmas Alzheimers And Dementia With Your Young Children

Ways to Discuss Grandma's Alzheimer's and Dementia with your Young Children

When a loved member of the family gets a crippling disease, it can be nearly impossible to discuss it with a young child. There will be many conflicting emotions and questions that develop in the uninformed mind. Unfortunately, children very rarely come right out and say what it is they're feeling, be it because they don't know what it is they're feeling, or because they simply don't want to talk about it. Either way, it makes the job of the parent a lot more difficult. There are a few ways to help the child cope, and there are also a few activities to try, to keep the child in touch with the family member.

Before discussing a degenerative disease like Alzheimer's, you must plan in advance for what the child could feel. You need to be prepared for every possible way the child could take the news, so you're ready no matter what happens. The first and most common emotion when a child learns of the disease is that of sadness. The child is sad, and uncomfortable with what is happening to the relative. This is followed closely by confusion and fear. Children don't have a very good grasp on what Alzheimer's is, and even with the best of explanations they're still going to be confused about why Grandma has begun to behave differently than usual. After they've figured out what exactly Alzheimer's is, many children will be hesitant to spend time with Grandma, believing they might catch the disease, or that their parents will. You must put that fear to rest immediately, so that the children know they have nothing to fear.

On the other side of the emotional spectrum, some children may begin to develop somewhat darker emotions. These include anger, frustration, guilt and jealousy. The reasons for those are varied. Some will be angry because they have to repeat questions, or will have trouble doing activities with the relative. After that, they'll feel guilty for being angry, believing that they should know better. Later on, they may even become jealous or resentful of the Alzheimer's victim, mostly because of the increased time that the rest of the family seems to spend worrying about them.

To discuss Alzheimer's with a child, you have to keep everything simple, while at the same time preparing them for what's to come. Make sure you fully understand it, so that you know how to answer questions when they inevitably pop up. Tell them that Grandma is still the same person she always was, but that she won't remember things that well and sometimes she won't know what she's doing. Make sure you mention that the disease is not contagious.

After the initial talk, be prepared to help the child cope with the fact that Grandma has Alzheimer's. You always need to be around to offer support, and give them a shoulder to cry on if they need it. Be sure to reassure them that any feelings they have are normal, and are nothing to be afraid of. Tell them that if they have any questions they can ask you, and be sure to answer them honestly. There's no sense in telling the child to ask questions if you're just going to lie, even if it's about the grimmer parts of the disease. “Sugar coat� if you must, but do not lie.

Lastly, there are several activities that a child can do with the individual who has Alzheimer's, preferably with the whole family. Simple things, like taking a walk together as a family, will do wonders for a child who is still unsure of what is happening. Make sure you involve Grandma in the child's life, so they aren't left in the dark about what's going on. Other things, such as singing and dancing are also enjoyable for both parties. Some people have found success by simple things like making a family tree, or watching a movie.

Always remember that when you're talking about a younger person about a disease such as Alzheimer's, to keep things simple enough for them to understand, and answer any questions they have. There is nothing worse for a child than for them to be both scared and confused. Keep that in mind, keep your arms open to them and you'll help them through.